A Biter Bit

My wife and I, like many others, find the widespread use of cellphones to be distracting and annoying.  This afternoon, my wife sat browsing a fashion magazine while I was trying on shirts at my favorite resale store [you cheap bastard].  Some self-important lout sat next to her, and began talking on his cellphone, in stentorian tones that rang throughout the store.  My wife is not one to suffer in silence, and she’s very creative, in her own sneaky way.  On the spot, she devised a tactic to repel this rude cellphone user–she started popping some bubblegum (it helps that she mastered this skill in junior high).  Within moments, Mr Cellphone was outside, carrying on his conversation with the sun, the sky, and the parked cars, and we were inside, enjoying the quiet.  I’m stocking up on bubblegum, and beginning my popping practice every morning, on the drive to work.